Todo akong magmahal
iAalay buo kong dangal
iiNdahin lahat ng bawal
daiG ko pa nga ang iyong mahal
na sA dulo ika’y tinalikuran
Tandaan mo ito
mAmahalin kita hanggang dulo
maNalig ka sa aking puso
hanGgang sa itakwil mo
tangA na kung tanga
MagpapakaTANGA para lang sayo
parang ang sarap nang may minamahal
ang abangan ang kanyang pagdating
ang masabik sa kanyang mga halik
ang damhin ang kanyang paglambing
parang ang sarap nang may nagmamahal
may kasukob sa ulan
may kayakap hindi lang ang unan
may kasama sa patutunguhan
parang ang sarap magmahal
ang kiligin kahit hindi pansin
ang sabikin kahit sa iba nakatingin
ang magmahal kahit hindi ikaw ang ibigin
You love me, you said, for ten years nowAnd when i opened my heart to you, spent more time with you,
had conversations with you,
I started to wonder. Was your love real or just an illusion of a long-time unrequited love?
You said you were my friend, for 10 years now. And now that you’re my partner, i realized you are not my equal
You’re not, because you don’t act like it
You have put me in a pedestal where its hard to reach you.
You were content on your place when i wanted to reach higher.
I said “yes” not quite sure.
But i have grown to love you.
But i realized,
I needed someone higher than me but have long arms to reach for me.
I needed our roles reversed.
I was willing to hold on and learn to love you more as much as you do, to see this through until God permits.
But with your questions and observations came the realization that you needed me to be “there” now. And i couldn’t go there fast enough. I want this journey i had started on my own.
My life, it’s not just about you. And its not fair when i can’t be that someone you needed now and not fair to set aside my dreams because i found you.
I’m sorry, I couldn’t love you now.
I’m sorry, i hurt you.
I’m sorry, i couldn’t let go of my dreams.
I’m sorry, i have doubts of my own.
I’m sorry. I have been alone too, i can’t seem to adjust to the changes you bring. I’m sorry, i couldn’t let go of my former self.
I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.
I will be sorry, even until you have forgiven me.
My heart burns.
After a dream i thought was a reality.
I fell in love to a person unexpectedly.
That moment when i realize i could love you — i was done as i am already.
That feeling when you smiled at me when i finally said “i love you, too”.
Its the best feeling i had that i could make you smile like that.
I didn’t know i could be happy being someone else’s happiness.
It makes me humble and ever so grateful I gave “us” a chance.
I didn’t know. I honestly had no clue.
But i thank the universe and Almighty, you didn’t go anywhere. You fought for that love. You never gave up. You believed. You pursued.
Before, i thought, your love for me was an illusion. Loving me that much is just too much. It can not be true.
But you pushed through.
And that moment when i looked into you. When i looked really hard. When i saw that glint in your eyes and you smiled. I felt it too. I loved you then. I love you now.
Then i opened my eyes. Saw the light slipping through the windows.
I thought my reality was you. Us.
I found out a second too soon.
Those wonderful emotions my heart gave me was just an illusion.
I can’t still love you. I am sorry, too.
Still, my heart burns.
My View From Here 