Tag Archives: regrets

T-A-N-G-A

3 Aug

Todo akong magmahal

iAalay buo kong dangal

iiNdahin lahat ng bawal

daiG ko pa nga ang iyong mahal

na sA dulo ika’y tinalikuran
Tandaan mo ito

mAmahalin kita hanggang dulo

maNalig ka sa aking puso

hanGgang sa itakwil mo

tangA na kung tanga 
MagpapakaTANGA para lang  sayo

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Hindi Na Muli

8 Jul

Sinabi ko noon,

“Hindi na muli.”

Sinabi ko noon,

na puno ng hapdi.

Sinabi ko noon–

iyon, nang puro hukbi.

Hindi ba muling pipili

ng taong ako’y ikukubli.

Hindi na muling isasantabi

mga pangarap at minimithi.

Hindi na muling magpapaapi

sa taong makasarili.

Kaya sabihin mo sa akin ngayon,

paano ako lilingon–

sa mapait na kahapon na puno ng mga alaalang pilit binabaon?

Kaya sabihin mo sa akin ngayon,

paano mo ako mapapaayon

na balikan natin ang kahapon?

I was then I am

24 Jun

I was born and in a foreign land.
I was a baby and they flew me to my mother’s home.

I was 1 and we were one, my

mother, father and i but after awhile they left me behind.

I was 2 and i cried a lot.

I was 3 and still nurtured by my mother’s mother, my favorite in the world.

I was 4 and i wanted to be a doctor.

I was 5 and i remember singing to my parents in a tape recorder.

I was 6 and i moved to my father’s home where he stays for good.

I was 7 and i was disciplined.

I was 8 and i had friends and a first crush.

I was 9 and i left them all behind 

for a home to call our own; my father became my best friend.

I was 10 and betrayed by a friend.

I was 11 and i thought i talk less than a person should. 

I was 12 and fat. Didn’t know how bad but i had an adult friend, a mother-figure and i’m glad.

I was 13 and i met lasting friends, it lessens the pain when i think mama has not come home again.

I was 14 and i experienced young love in pain.

I was 15 and i don’t know what i want; the pressure for a course; and a resounding “no” for becoming a nurse.

I was 16 and alone again. Failed promises and unintentional course taking courses.

I was 17 and i had tasks to fill.

I was 18 and they have elected me a leader.

I was 19 and still going up the ladder.

I was 20 and opportunities come, i grabbed them all.

I was 21 and i was where i was supposed to be and pressured to pursue.

I was 22 and my father left me for good.

I was 23, the blackest year, a fallout with mother.

I was 24, thought i could escape from it all. I did but then no.

I am 25, escaped but not free. Out of purpose and lagging behind.

HERE COMES THE BREAK-UP

30 Jul

the scene IN A RELATIONSHIP for 5, 6… 15 years?

Then suddenly, you’re SINGLE.

 

You keep hearing people say, “What a wasted years.” Or sympathies for the lost years spent with him.

Its like finding out your TRUTH is a MISTAKE. Or like you’ve been blind and suddenly you see. Or CAGED and finally you’re FREE.

 

Let me tell you this.

Those years are not wasted years. It’s not something “better left forgotten”. It is not a dark hole in your past. It is NOT NOTHING. It is SOMETHING because it’s a part of YOU.

 

DON’T WASTE a heartache to bitterness and other dark forces that’ll control your future.

EMBRACE IT for it happened for a reason; with a cause to make you better.

 

Remember the past. Relive the moments of happiness and of learnings.

Smile when you remember the butterflies, the chemistry, the excitement, the awesomeness, the laughters, the craziness. Feel the gratitude of having experienced those. NOT EVERYONE IS FORTUNATE to that.

Forgive the heartaches. Forgive him. Forgive yourself. ACCEPTANCE.

Relearn the lessons. SHARPEN YOURSELF.

And LOVE still.

GO ON.

Carry on without the person. NO REGRETS.

Be joyous for the love you had been given. Be amazed by the love you were capable of giving. LOVE IS A GIFT.